Sammy, the Gat: “I Doodle On My Noodle”

(Glossary at end.)

I eyeball it past Lefty Louie, who’s standin’next to me, and digitize the slick pics the precip rough-drafts on the frame pane of the fly-to. Double L’s etch-a-sketch reflection mimes him finger-itchin’ to double-clamp my ab-slab. My alarm system pops its cork just before I hear the pillow-talk-whisper of a silencer’s dread-lead whizzin’ past my bean-o.
“You in on this?” I ask, as I head-butt Mosquito Man to the floor.
“Just the letter carrier,” he gasps, as a follow-up ugh-slug splits his lid.
So, again, I doodle on my noodle as I tumbersault to safety. Shooters: Feds or Mob Bobs?  Target: me or the Gauchester?
And, the big one: what’s t’come?

THE GATIONARY of Sammy Speak

: n. arm.   bean-o: n. head.   digitize: v. to make note of.
doodle on my noodle: v. to think.   double-clamp: v. to clasp.   Double L: n. Lefty Louie.   dread-lead: n. bullet.   etch-a-sketch: adj. outlined.   eyeball: v. to look.
finger-itch: v. to desire.   fly-to: n. airport.   follow-up: adj. second.
frame-pane: n. window.   Gauchester: n. Lefty Louie.   hang: v. to stand.
letter carrier: n.  messenger.   mime: v. to mimic; replicate.
Mosquito Man: n. Lefty Louie.   pillow-talk-whisper: n. whooshing sound.
pop-a-cork: v. to go off; explode. precip: n. rain.   rough-draft: v. to create.
slick pic: n. pattern.   split a lid: v. deliver fatal head wound.  ugh-slug: n. bullet

(Click to catch up on Sammy, the Gat.)

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7 Responses to Sammy, the Gat: “I Doodle On My Noodle”

  1. I’m getting better at this, but it’s still a bit like doing translations in German or some other language–I know just enough to be dangerous, not enough to get near “fluent”. 🙂 I love “doodle on my noodle”, even though I first thought it meant he hit the floor headfirst. It also sounds like writing on a bald head–very literal interpretation, of course. How do you make all this stuff up???


    • vb holmes says:

      I like the “writing on a head” definition–I’ll have to remember that one. As far as making up words, I’m a firm believer in the “rules are made to be broken” approach and what better way to satisfy that itch than to abuse the King’s English.

  2. billgncs says:

    this like was perfect!!!! “You in on this?” I ask, as I head-butt Mosquito Man to the floor.
    great one VB!

  3. vb holmes says:

    Thanks, Bill–I had fun with that one, too.

  4. please resend several stories with dictionary and pencil sketch to Things are disappearing in my save places or I can’t remember where I put them. I am sure my ex is behind this conspiracy even though divorce was in 1984.

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